India to declare secret of its cold blood on the auspicious occasion of Republic Day
In a grand ceremony of Republic day today, Indian Government is planning to reveal the secret of its cold blood and genes of unresponsiveness.
"Yea, there are inquiries from many countries which really want to understand India's great power of remaining cold on any attack. We are planning to reveal how we learnt not to react and how our bodies are flowing with cold blood," said Salman Khurshid to India Satire correspondent in an interview.
Recently, India kept its blood chill after one Indian was died in Pakistan just ahead of 4 days his release because Policemen beaten him with animal approach. India's strength of remaining cold was demonstrated not just this decade but before independence when India remained cool with British and at the time of separation with Pakistan. These genes of unresponsiveness were fairly used by Pt. Jawaharlal Nehru against Pakistan and China who broke down Indian constituencies. This technique also used by Indira Gandhi who despite the defeat of Pakistan allowed remaining Kashmir in their territory. The same technique adopted by Atal Bihari Vajpayee with his Samjhauta rally. Now, the recent UPA government is also using the same cold blood genes to tackle issues like many terror attacks such as train blasts, 26/11 and killing of our soldiers and countrymen. The same example of cold blood India had shown with Chamel Singh, an Indian national, who was about to complete his five-year imprisonment on charges of espionage, has died in a Pakistani jail, amid reports that he was "mercilessly beaten" by prison staff two days before his death.
"We usually talk each other that at least India would take revenge this time. Oh no still it managed to keep its blood cold. Wow, such wonderful patience. We are really surprised to know how India manages to do such wonderful things," said Israel, Prime minister, Benjamin Netanyahu.
Finally, after consistent persistence by all the countries in the World, India decided to reveal the secret of its blood. India will reveal the secret today in Delhi in a grand ceremony of Republic day where it allow world to collect its blood samples and further research them.
Salman Khurshid said "World is amazed that India is the most peaceful country with unresponsive nature. These kind of cold blooded breeds are found on deadly dead planets. However, to the matter of fact we kept it secret not to reveal it. We thought that our formula should not go in the hands of terror countries such as USA, Israel, China etc. which these countries may use to remain unresponsive to any peaceful terror attack. However, due to insistence of many other countries we finally decided to show the formula how we keep our blood cold despite the enemy might kill my neighbour's mother, wife, his children and all other people. Our blood is also design to meet the extreme situation criteria such as even the entire country is killed by Pakistani terrorists, their military or even their Police force we will keep our blood cold," said the External Affairs Minister.
Even many scientists are amazed with India's cold blood like characteristics.
"I don't understand how they can manage to remain cool despite serious attacks on country's sovereignty," said an Indian scientist requesting anonymity.
He said "These chilled politicians also manage to become rude, strict and hot blooded when their own countrymen gets angry. This attitude is really god gifted needed to be properly researched."
